Yesterday I flew to Washington DC for a conference. I really don't
like flying. I mean, I don't hate it or anything, but I don't get all
excited at the prospect.
We drove the two hours to the airport and got stopped for speeding (let off with a warning). I went through the security line, put my clothes back on and drug my bag to the gate. Why is your bag always heavier at the airport? Do airplanes cause more of a gravitational pull? Twenty-five minutes to departure. Perfect.
"If I have not put a pink tag on your luggage showing it is checked, I will do it when you come through the boarding gate", comes over the intercom. Every eye in the gate area looks at me. Great. I'm going to be the one that delays the flight. Who's everyone's favorite passenger? That's right. Me.
On the plane and I open the in-flight magazine to figure out when I can break out the iPod. The last page is an article by Rob Sheffield. I love Rob Sheffield. My ideal man would have Rob Sheffield's brain. This would make the real Rob a zombie, but, oh well. (ha! Rob Zombie. I crack myself up.) While I read Rob's article on how great MTV used to be I missed the safety lessons. Fantastic. Now I have no clue on how to turn my seat cushion into a flotation device should we unexpectedly land in a large body of water. Hmm. Large bodies of water between Missouri and DC include...the Missouri River and some other miscellaneous rivers that I may have learned at one time, but have since forgotten. Even the reflecting pool on the Mall has been drained. I'm feeling pretty safe. No large bodies of water. No wonder Thomas Jefferson was so hip on the Louisiana Purchase. Baby needed a new swimming hole!
The flight was smooth and landed 30 minutes early. Must have been my day to ride with speeding men. I don't care as I got where I needed to be on time and safely. Kudos, gentlemen.
Hello, Washington DC.
We drove the two hours to the airport and got stopped for speeding (let off with a warning). I went through the security line, put my clothes back on and drug my bag to the gate. Why is your bag always heavier at the airport? Do airplanes cause more of a gravitational pull? Twenty-five minutes to departure. Perfect.
"If I have not put a pink tag on your luggage showing it is checked, I will do it when you come through the boarding gate", comes over the intercom. Every eye in the gate area looks at me. Great. I'm going to be the one that delays the flight. Who's everyone's favorite passenger? That's right. Me.
On the plane and I open the in-flight magazine to figure out when I can break out the iPod. The last page is an article by Rob Sheffield. I love Rob Sheffield. My ideal man would have Rob Sheffield's brain. This would make the real Rob a zombie, but, oh well. (ha! Rob Zombie. I crack myself up.) While I read Rob's article on how great MTV used to be I missed the safety lessons. Fantastic. Now I have no clue on how to turn my seat cushion into a flotation device should we unexpectedly land in a large body of water. Hmm. Large bodies of water between Missouri and DC include...the Missouri River and some other miscellaneous rivers that I may have learned at one time, but have since forgotten. Even the reflecting pool on the Mall has been drained. I'm feeling pretty safe. No large bodies of water. No wonder Thomas Jefferson was so hip on the Louisiana Purchase. Baby needed a new swimming hole!
The flight was smooth and landed 30 minutes early. Must have been my day to ride with speeding men. I don't care as I got where I needed to be on time and safely. Kudos, gentlemen.
Hello, Washington DC.
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